Avoiding love
by Ofcourseiamapotterhead
Summary: The story of Pansy Parkinson's battle with herself as she tries to ignore her feelings for the boy she loves. Enjoy.. Disclaimer- I own nothing.
1. Chapter 1

**a/n: just give it a try. I need inspiration so bad please read and review, let me know if its pants or if i should go somewhere with this.**

**thanks guys xoxo**

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She hated herself for it, honestly she did!

The irony that infested her thoughts was advancing throughout her body like venom.

She pitied her mother for being so dependent upon her father- working herself to the point of exhaustion to receive his measly gestures of appreciation; it was as if her reason for breathing was to see him breathe.

Pansy had grew up witnessing it and had, only recently, been enlightened as to how a marriage should function; mutual respect.

It was so alien to the girl and forced her to feel pity- pity for her mother. Who was unaware that her life was not a life at all but an existence. Her mother who was content, satisfied, blinded by a deceitful concept called love.

From then on Pansy strived to avoid it at all cost. But how exactly does one avoid love?

At the first her plan of action was to make herself undesirable; she cut her hair, never wore make-up, moulded herself a cruel exterior and only hung around with the boys in a subtle attempt to avoid being acknowledged as 'one of the girls'...

And at the time it had worked. No boy ever gave her a second glance; and she was so relieved!

But now the irony hung around like a bitter smell. She could feel the deceit smothering her and impairing her judgment.. She couldn't escape love, it had found her. She feared it and, as it tightened its grasp on her, she knew she was powerless to stop it.

After all; who knows how to avoid love?

Of course this was the worst part- the part that sickened her to her butterfly filled stomach;

_He_ knows how.

_He_ does avoid it.

Such a pity...

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**Yeah, sorry its crap- it's kind if late here haha. **

**Thank you for reading anyway though guys!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Gazing up at the stars she let out a deep sigh.

The top of the astronomy tower had always succumbed to be her salvation- even if it technically was Ravenclaw territory. Up here Pansy felt free and, particular this late at night, she could enjoy the solitude.

It baffled her that she had only truly discovered this part of the castle on her fifth year! Of course she had taken astronomy classes up here but she had never truly acknowledged the beauty of the view at night; being a prefect had enabled her to wander after curfew.

So, every night after patrolling the castle she would slip up here and admire the stars- so free, so far away from where she was stuck. These stars were so beautiful yet hardly ever acknowledged let alone done any justice! And simply because they are always there they got taken for granted.

She knew what her subconscious wanted her to focus on, she knew it wanted her to mull things over,achieve closure, but to gain closure she had to accept what she felt; disappointment, and to do that would mean admitting her feelings towards that boy.

'No,' she squinted her eyes as she argued with herself 'As a slytherin.. As a Parkinson, everything you want is achieved.. You simply didn't want it. Trick of the mind.' She smiled at herself, momentarily convinced she was correct.

But if those feelings had not been true then she had never felt anything honest in her whole life!

A groan escaped her lips and she buried her head In her hands, sinking to the ground as she did so. A cool breeze blew against her pale face, causing her hair to dance in celebratory freedom.

She was thinking about him, in all honestly she nearly always thought about him, but more often than not she was conjuring up ways to stop thinking about him. Ways to fool her mind into believing that his pale complexion wasn't appealing, his blonde hair not intriguing, nor were his stormy eyes encapsulating or his smell intoxicating- it was no use. Pansy could lie to herself about his appearance and, being a Slytherin, her lies were so solid she was often close to convincing herself but when it came to lying about him.. His personality, demeanour, the way he held himself, it felt like vandalism every time she tried.

She hated him for making her like this.

An absent tear had escaped her deep brown eyes and she shunned herself for caring.

'Stupid girl." She whispered out loud her harsh voice being swept away by the breeze.

She hated crying, even when she was by herself.

It was common Slytherin knowledge that to cry was to display weakness- and Pansy's weakness was so demanding she feared, if ever unleashed, it would consume her. Although, she had once enjoyed the concept of him consuming her, now she felt ashamed for even pondering the thought.

She sniffed and wiped her face on the back of her sleeve, she was fed up of being the feeble component to her mind.

"Pansy," she addressed herself out aloud, about to begin ranting to herself.

"Parkinson?" The voice startled her so much she cricked her neck turning to see him, rubbing her neck whilst her gaze met his questioning stare.

"What the bloody hell are you doing up here? I ts freezing! He advanced towards her taking off his robe and draping it over her- this was not a romantic gesture, this was just a display of Draco's upbringing.

"Yeah, Erm I'm studying," her hands divided into her own robes and pulled out a peice of parchment, unfolded it and handed it to him.

He examined it, raising one eyebrow accompanied by his signature smirk.

"Parks, we only got given this star chat today," he sat on the ground next to her and turned the homework around to show her the completed table. "And you've finished it."

"What's your point Malfoy?"

"That you obviously found it easy, no doubt your fascinated by the stars?" He swatted his eyes in the direction of the open sky.

She swallowed.

"Me, on the other hand," he began whilst bringing both hands to the back of his neck in a nonchalant stretch. "Iv never cared much for them... Well they're always just there aren't they." He added after acknowledging her blank expression. "They're here tonight, they'll be here tomorrow night..they will be here for as long as we are, with no purpose but to shine for us." He lengthened his neck to observe the night- clearly oblivious to how his words were affecting Pansy. "Why waste time admiring something that will always be there?"

Her throat felt dry but she managed to exhale a sharp Laugh in spite of herself; _figures!_

"Wow, that's real deep Malfoy but what do you want?" She jibed

He turned his attention to her and pouted out his lower lip. "Astronomy's not my strong point and your so-"

Pansy interrupted, he was so transparent."You want me to do your homework for you?"

Triumph flashed in his eyes.

"Well there's an idea! Thanks Parks!" He swiftly leaned closer to her causing her to inhale sharply, his hands roamed through the pockets of his robe she was wearing and he withdrew an identical piece of parchment. She subtly released the breath she had been holding as he unfolded it and handed it to her with a charming smirk.

"Cheers, your the best." He spoke as he planted a kiss on her cheek and began to stand up.

She wasn't fazed by this, it was a signature Draco Malfoy manipulation technique. Instead she raised her eyebrows and grabbed his wrist to stop him leaving,

"Erm, dick head?" She addressed him jovially. "I'm not doing your homework for you, don't be silly." She scoffed and smiled slyly. "Besides, I didn't do that anyway..It's Grangers," she watched him shudder as he realised he had touched something that belonged to 'MudBlood Granger' and shrugged her shoulders "I nicked it, had no name on soo.. It's Pansy's now."

**-He watched her smile spread across her face as she leant against the pillar and gazed out at the sky. He was impressed. But mainly frustrated; no way was he going to do his own homework.-**

"Oh don't pout at me Malfoy" she commented noticing his expression, "it's spoils your whole 'bad ass demeanour'"

He shifted his face quickly and glared at her.

"Oh, shut up Parkinson, just do my work would you?"

"No," she snapped and whipped her head in his direction, "and you owe me an apology anyway- treating me like one of your little whores.. I'm not Astoria you know, Malfoy. Those little kisses have no effect on me" _lie_ " I deserve some bloody respect!"

**-He shifted uncomfortable. He did respect her, Pansy was the only girl who he had ever respected. She was different to the others.-**

He smiled apologetically, "come off it Parks, I'm sorry alright. You know I'm just shit at astronomy. Can you please help me do it. _Pleassssssee_ .." He leaned in as he said the word knowing it effected her when he said it. He carried the words out until he was practically hissing next to her ear.

"Fine!" She couldn't maintain her scowl with him so instead hit him over the shoulder with his blank star chart.. "But you owe me."

"Nice one Pan- Parkinson," he shuffled closer to her so they could begin his homework.

It wasn't obvious because she wasn't 'love sick', but she loved him- and it sickened her.

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**A/n- Help me out here, whack us a review just to let me know someone's reading. Il be eternally grateful :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n: all rights go to JK Rowling.**

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**Chapter**** 3**

"There remains to be, a mere 5 months until you shall all sit your OWL examinations. Yet it is suffice to say that a number of you are..lacking commitment," Snape'a voice filled the potion classroom as he paced the tables, clinging onto every odd word as he did so.  
"Tell me, Mr Potter, how many remedial potion lessons will it take for you to achieve.._any_ motivation in this subject?-what was that Weasley?" The potion master's head snapped in the direction of the ginger boy sat next to his victim. "Perhaps the two of you could serve detention tonight cleaning out the trophy room.. I understand that would be excellent experience for your future careers if you-do-not-pay-attention-in-my-class!"  
The Slytherins all chuckled in unison; potions was the best lesson, if it could be called a lesson, it was mainly just a half hour of Snape terrorising the Gryffindoors.  
That's not to say it wasn't a tough subject, it certainly was no charms; which came naturally to Pansy. She'd had to work extra hard in potions to keep up as it was just compulsory that all Slytherin students excelled in it-and she had a feeling Snape wouldn't take it too lightly if she so much as got an A.

Saying all that she didn't mind the extra tutoring sessions that Draco had offered to give her:

"Honestly Parkinson, it's not as hard as you think- your over complicating it." The pair had crept into the potions classroom after curfew and were battling Pansy's inability to produce a hiccuping solution.  
"You don't even know if yours works!" She complained, folding her arms across her chest. "Neither of us have the hiccups so how on earth are we supposed to test it?"  
"I know what it's supposed to look like, trust me- I'm an expert." He flashed her a cocky grin.  
"Really?," she challenged him.  
"Yeahh!.. Why?"  
"Well," she slowly began to stir the liquid in her cauldron. "I'm just not convinced that you've made this enough times to be an 'expert'."  
He snorted, "Parkinson, iv made this more times than Daphne's made a beautification potion."  
"Hmm.. So you get the hiccups often then, Malfoy?" She smirked. He stopped smiling.  
"Does little Malfoy, get scared a lot?" She pouted and brought her chin to her chest.  
His brow furrowed as he turned away from her to peruse the potion.  
"Apart from being scared by your inability to concoct a basic potion; no, I most certainly do not get scared often."

She dropped her act. As much as she hated it, he was right, the substance that was hissing about in her cauldron really was shocking!

"I mean, how is that even possible?" He was turning his nose up at the smell the liquid was giving off whilst taking a few steps back. "Scourgify."

She watched her 'potion' vanish into thin air sadly- it was her third attempt this evening! But as a Slytherin she was determined to succeed: "Can I try again?"  
She tempted him with a painfully artificial smile and attempted to pry the textbook from his hands.

"No, Parks, I don't think so." She opened her mouth to protest but he cut her off- "oh, don't start your whining for merlins sake!"  
Pansy huffed and made to snatch her cauldron off of the desk but found her hand caged by his fist. "It's just your making me nervous." She smiled for a fraction of a second but swiftly turned it into a sly grin.  
"I make you nervous do I?" She winked devilishly as his eyes widened. "Is that why you get the hiccups?" She added, nudging him with her shoulder.

He opened his mouth to argue but couldn't conjure a witty remark to return her jest. Instead he laughed- a little too harshly, causing her smile to shift as her gaze descended from his to the floor.

He let her hand go.

"Do you want to try again?"  
She shook her head, re-introducing her own hands to one another in front of her and allowing a smile to intrude on her lips. "Not if my potions make you hiccup."

He began to clear up the ingredients, "I'm nervous for your sake what Snape would say if he were to smell.. Well, whatever that was giving off! Then come in here and find us." Draco said whilst smirking over his shoulder from the stock cupboard. "You'd be mortified!"

"Gee, thanks for your concern Malfoy" Pansy spoke sarcastically, "I'm sure your nervous hiccups would have been a good enough excuse to why we were here making the remedy though"  
His eyes met hers and he nodded, "touché"  
"Besides," she added as the two of them headed for door. "Even if we told him the truth; that I'm practising the most useless potion in wizarding history, he can't really get mad can he, I mean- it's academic!"

"I've no doubt your charm would have won him over with that statement Parkinson." She nodded, "my charm is irresistible."

They had made it halfway to the Slytherin common room, so delved in arguing about charm and hiccups that Pansy didn't notice the Weasley Wizard Wheezes puking pastille that lay predominantly in her path.

The next few moments happened rather quickly; Pansy- in mid sentence- lost her trail of thought as her heel skimmed something round and hard. She inhaled a sharp intake of breath, then she felt her legs sweep from underneath her and in a desperate attempt to regain her balance; threw her arms out to her sides and shut her eyes tightly awaiting the hard concrete of the floor on her back.

But it never came.  
Instead she felt something snake around her upper back and waist causing her eyes to fly open.  
Draco hadn't realised what he was doing, his actions had happened so fast all he knew was Pansy had been about to fall and his mind had just screamed "catch her!".. So he had.

Now they clung to each other in the dimly lit dungeons...

Faces barely an inch apart...

His eyes scanned hers for instructions.

Then Pansy hiccuped.

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To be continued...

**A/n: your views are always valued so please review- even if just to let me know** **someone's reading it. Constructive criticism is appreciate so don't be shy:) hope you enjoyed it!**


	4. Chapter 3 Part 2

**Chapter 3 **

**continued...**

He had to refrain himself from smiling, in fact he had to refrain from smirking; he didn't have the time to distinguish between the two and couldn't afford to get them mixed up.

He could not smile right now.

With Pansy in his arms, her wide eyes frozen on his, he was very aware of their close proximity- if he were to accidentally _smile_...

He knew girls over analysed everything, but then again he also knew that Pansy was different. Still, the risk was too great. He wasn't sure what expression he displayed (if any at all) but her eyes darted to something/someone behind him and she hiccuped again.

"Malfoy. Parkinson." The droning voice of Professor Snape filled the corridor.

Draco snapped up straight, bringing Pansy to her feet at such a speed that she almost flew at the potions master.

Snape stepped aside with a bored expression on his face and watched the girl attempt to regain her balance whilst continuing:

"It displeases me to have to deduct points from my own house. However, I will be forced to do just that if neither of you can come up with a convincing excuse as to why you are patrolling the castle.. After curfew."

Draco was never any good at thinking on the spot so he shot a pleading expression at Pansy who, unable to speak due to lack of breath, subtly pinched the lapel of her cloak.

"Sir," he began as if his answer was obvious. "Don't we have prefect duties? Myself and Parkinson were-"

"Considering you are a Slytherin," Snape interrupted. "your inability to lie baffles me."

Draco's mouth snapped shut, he extended his neck slight and broadened his shoulders: how dare he say that! Being a Slytherin and a pure blood was all he had.

"It may have escaped your knowledge, Draco, but as a head of house I know that dancing with Miss Parkinson in the corridors after hours is not one of the requirement of prefects."

Draco never spoke a word of his thoughts but began hexing Snape in his mind- not only was he acting like Mcgonagall, he was making things between himself and Pansy more awkward than they already were.

As if he knew what the boy was thinking, the professor slowly raised an eyebrow and opened his mouth but-

"Inquisitorial squad, sir" Pansy blurted out. "He means inquisitorial duties." She flashed Snape the green badge that clung proudly to her robe.

He stiffened, "I suggest you proceed the common room. The pair of you." And with that he continued his way down the corridor.

They watched him stride away, his greasy hair reflecting the dismal light of the dungeon.

"What's up his arse?" Spat Draco, he couldn't believe his favourite teacher would behave like that towards him.

Pansy leaned closer to get a last glimpse of Snape before concluding:

"Umbridge I'll bet!'

He exhaled a snort in agreement before acknowledging how close she was to him, reminding him of their awkward situation.

Fortunately, Pansy hadn't recognised (or hadn't responded) to his sudden tension, instead she elbowed him jovially.

"A fine demonstration of seeker reflexes there, though."

He offered her a confused look: how was it that she was so un phased by what had happened and _he_ was so wound up, after all it was- it wasn't-he tried to convince himself it was nothing more than a hiccup.

On the contrary, Pansy was not unphased by any stretch of the word but, having forced herself to mask her emotions for so long, had become an expert in feeling one thing and showing another.

And in this moment her actions were a desperate attempt at regaining some normality before things got too weird- after all, nothing had really happened.

She waited, desperate for him to follow suit.

"Yeah, well my reflexes are pretty sick." Thank Merlin, she thought. "What did you slip on anyway, your ego?"

That's bloody rich coming from him.

"Oh no," she spoke with authenticity. "My ego is far too high up for me to slip over it." He smiled-Cursed in his head- then smirked.

Pansy retrieved her wand from her robe, "lumos..." She swirled it around in front of her. "Figures!" She hissed as she located the sweet wrapper. "What self respecting Slytherin would buy one of those things from them Weasleys?"

He shrugged, "beats me."

They made their way to the common room discussing blood traitors and mud bloods. Both silently grateful that the awkwardness had passed.

"I can't wait till the house cup this year- now that we can take points from other houses." He sounded almost giddy! To which she couldn't help but smile.

"You know it's all down to you and me to make sure Slytherin wins." She spoke without thinking.

Draco slowed his pace.

"You and me?" His mouth twitched.

Oh crap- she thought.

"Yeah. You, me and the whole squad." She was such a Slytherin when it came to quick thinking.

He must have been holding his breath for he exhaled deeply before grinning. "It's as if Salazar himself has given us a mission."

They were in the common room now standing just before the room divided in two sections separated by gender.

"Goodnight Parkinson."

"See you tomorrow Draco." She turned swiftly so he couldn't see her scrunched up expression.

_Malfoy! Malfoy! Not Draco you fool!_

He watched her march away from him, had she called him Draco?

Shaking his head hard he attempted to rid his mind from the happenings of this evening: he wasn't sure he wanted to know what would happen of he went to bed _thinking of Pansy Parkinson_..

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A/n: please please please review, you know you want too:)

Does anyone want another chapter?


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Pansy woke early the next morning; it was a Saturday and the Slytherin quidditch team had practise. Not that she _had_ to be there- of course she wasn't on the team! But ever since her friends had joined she'd gone along to every practise.

She usually sat with Crabbe and Goyle; warming the benches and listening to them hoping someone gets injured so they can fill in, whilst her other friend soared around the pitch showing off.

_Her other friend.. Friend. Remember that pansy, he's just your friend! _

She sighed. It felt like every morning she had to remind herself of this; she'd wanted it to be like this, she'd wanted to avoid any chance of becoming like her mother.

A little blip, a phase, she was slipping only momentarily- nothing serious/ nothing to worry about.

Convinced, she slipped out of bed and began digging through her trunk for her weekend clothes, being as quiet as possible so as not to wake her dorm mates.

She successfully located her denim shorts, a pair of black tights and converse, a green collared shirt and black knit jumper- it was typical English weather; cloudy and windy. She grabbed her Slytherin scarf from the foot of her bed and had just got to the door when a tired voice caught her.

"Where you"-yawn-"off to?"

She turned and smiled, "breakfast and then Quidditch practise."

"Time's it?"

Pansy shrugged. "Early? Go back to sleep Daphne."

"Why do you go to those Practises Pansy? You act like your the bloody cheerleader!" She snickered. "But your not, yenno." The girl sat up in her bed so she could insult Pansy from a better angle. "Your not even like... The water girl or something useful, your like that mascot that gets in the way."

Pansy wasn't going to give the girl the satisfaction of reacting.

"Are you done?"

"Just stay out the way okay."

"I don't recall ever being in your way, Daphne."

The girl pouted. "Draco has a girlfriend, Pansy. Stay out of _Astoria's_ way, got it."

Pansy tried her best not to laugh.

Astoria was Draco's girlfriend?- yeah, one out of how many?!

She smiled patronisingly "whatever you say, Daph." And slipped out the dormitory.

A part of her felt sorry for Astoria; she can't possibly think she's his girlfriend, can she? She made a mental note to tell Draco; certain he'd want to hear about it if any gossip of *that nature was swimming through the school.

x

"Pansy! Pansy!" Marcus Flint the, Slytherin captain, came jogging up behind her on her way to the great hall. "Just the man I was looking for-" she blinked but her offence went unnoticed. "You coming to practise, yeah." She nodded. "Good, iv got a job for you."

"If you ask me to be a mascot I swear to Salazar il hex your balls off!"

He laughed. "I want you to write us a chant."

"A what?"

"You know like a cheer? Something better than petty 'roar roar Gryffidoor'." He did a high pitched impression of their rivals. "I know your a true supporter of Quidditch- you've been to every training session- and I know your smart and creative soo? What d'you say?"

"Do you also know that I have about 5 months till my OWLs?"

He became desperate. "Oh come on, Pansy! You can write it about _whatever_ you want.."

She raised an eyebrow; intreaged. "I'll even get someone to help you- who're your mates ? hmm- Malfoy!"

The blonde had just emerged from the hall wearing his Quidditch robes and rubbing his stomach. Trust him to stuff his face before a practise!

"Flint." He nodded and obeyed as his captain beaconed him over.

"You and Parkinson are going to be our cheerleaders- I mean, you're going to write the best chant this school has ever heard."

Draco exchanged amused glances with Pansy and raised his eyebrows.

"Right." He waited for Pansy to nod before accepting. "Sure."

Flint exhaled deeply, "I knew you'd do it. Thanks guys; do me proud!" And with that, headed into the hall.

Draco and Pansy checked no one was around before laughing.

"How are we supposed to do that?" He asked her.

She shrugged innocently as an idea began forming in her head.

"Right," he continued clapping his hands. "You haven't had breakfast yet have you." She nodded. "Don't lie to me." He pointed his finger at her. "Go grab some toast, il wait here."

When she returned they made their way to the Quidditch field inventing inappropriate songs to present to Flint:

"When the Slytherins fly;

Mcgonagall will die,

Sprouts heart will flutter,

Tralawney'll be found in a gutter,

Umbridge will scream:

"Slytherin's the best team,

They deserve that 1st place block

That seekers got a massive..."

"Oh yeah, that ones golden!" She joked and pushed him gently.

"What? Don't think the house will chant it?"

"No I think they will," she smirked. "They're Slytherins aren't they? They're used to lying."

"Oi!" He went to tickle he but she doubled over and screamed.

"Keep your voice down child!" Commanded one of the small paintings. "It's far too early!"

A mischievous grin grew on their faces before Malfoy pushed the frame with his finger causing it to spin on its peg.

"Go! Run!" He shouted to Pansy over the threats and swears of the painting as it whizzed at an alarming speed.

The pair ran tat top speed he rest of the way to the pitch and stopped to catch their breath.

They leaned against each other breathing heavily until they could gain enough oxygen to laugh.

"I'm not lying though." He stated when he could speak. "Ask anyone- ask Astoria." He winked causing her to remember something.

"About that-" she laughed lightly. "Daphne told me Astoria reckons she's your 'girlfriend'"

He frowned for a second and let out a bemused chuckle.

"Well?…She is." He started towards the changing room. "I'll meet you on the bench after practise Parks." He turned to face her, oblivious to her mouth hanging ajar "start thinking on that tune."

And then was gone.

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**A/n: I'm worried I'm either making them too OoC or changing how I'm portraying them throughout the story.. Let me know please? **

**Hope your enjoying it, comment for another chapter**


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

**Part one**

That practise was a very long one; and a lonely one at that- Crabbe and Goyle had left the bench and had been assigned the position of beaters.

So Pansy was left to her thoughts.

She took this as an opportunity to feel her emotions. Yes, it was a secret method of hers on how to stay sane; Slytherins rarely let their emotions surface and instead forced them to remain bottled up until eventually they'd crack.

Pansy had never liked the idea of 'cracking' so when she was alone she would _feel_ it.

And right now she was feeling anger.

She knew that anger wasn't what she should be feeling; hurt, embarrassed, naive, maybe even jealousy? But in her head they all merged to anger.

Merlin was she pissed!

Pissed at what? She wasn't sure and she didn't care. Anger was almost comforting to her because it mainly over ruled her other feelings.

So she felt her anger;

Anger at Astoria

Anger at Daphne

Anger at Flint

Anger at Quidditch

But no anger at him... She was never angry at him but only envious of his apparent immunity to love; or that's what she'd thought. Now it seemed that he just plainly didn't love her- he had other _interests._

Her anger faltered and was replaced by an uncomfortable ache.

She loved him; although it was well hidden from him, she couldn't hide that fact from herself. She'd accepted that the weakness was in her genes; hereditary.

That's all love was- a weakness.

A scary, powerful weakness.

Her eyes itched and she knew it wasn't from the wind. She'd have to either get a grip of herself or subtly leave the field-loosing face in front of other Slytherins was not an option.

"I'll meet you on the bench after practise, Parks." His words reverberated through her head and finalising her decision she turned her emotions off and focused on a inventing a chant.


	7. Chapter 5 part 2

**A/n: I think something weirds going on with the chapters, if your having trouble following the story PM me. **

**Enjoy..**

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**Chapter 5 **

**Part 2**

"Don't come near me unless you've showered." She demanded when she saw him trotting over. He gave her a humoured look.

"Parkinson, I'm a Malfoy, I do not sweat- I glow." She rolled her eyes. "But yes I've showered and I'm itching to hear this chant that's had you scowling for the entire practise."

"Huh?" He'd seen her spend the last hour with her face scrunched up.

"I have not been scowling!" She said defensively. "It's just too bloody cold"

"It's not cold, you just need more meat on you." He joked but stopped smiling when he saw her disdainful glare and changed the subject. "Common room then?"

A threatening thunder from the grey sky answered for her and the pair swiftly darted for indoors before the rain clouds drenched them.

x

The common room was vacant when they reached it; although the dancing green light on the walls that echoed the rain viscously hitting the lake outside the window indicated it would soon be swarming with wet students.

Pansy made a beeline to the armchair closest to the fire and, subconsciously, shuffled over so Draco could perch on the edge.

"So, Astoria?" She forced her voice to sound as casual as possible.

"I know, shes a bit young-"

"She's a practically a child Draco! What is she? A third year." He nodded sheepishly. "I hope you feel really bad- your going to mess with a little girls head."

He wrinkled his nose. "Don't call her a 'little girl' it makes me sound like a right weirdo. And I'm not messing with her head, she knows the deal."

"The deal? You called her your girlfriend."

A sly grin grew on his face that held a hint of pride.

"I call all of them that."

She shook her head slowly, "your sick."

His grin was replaced by a frown. "Why do you care about Astoria anyways? Your supposedly Miss solitary when it comes to the other girls."

She struggled to think of a quick come back.

"Piss off." Was all she could muster before adding. "And I'm not 'Miss solitary' it's just those girls have boys as their main priority and I'd rather not sink that low." -She wast lying, she wished she hadn't already sunk- "But, however pathetic it is, it's still what they care about. And I'm not dead inside yenno, if Astoria went round snivelling for the next few months it would really piss me off."

He raised his brow, "from the heart Parks?"

She nodded, "truly. Plus I feel I am obliged to defend her- as a woman."

He snickered.

"I am a woman!"

"I know. I just can't believe your giving me the whole 'girls unite' speech."

She shifted awkwardly in the chair. It wasn't customary for her show any moral decency towards other girls. Traditionally she'd gone out her way to keep her distance and, being a Slytherin, traditionalism was an important theme in her life.

"Full of surprises aren't you." It was the sort of thing he would have usually said in a flirtatious manor but in that moment it was as if he'd spoken his thoughts out loud.

Pansy inched her eyes up to see his carelessly gazing at her. He shot her a brief smile before turning to face the fire.

"So," he began. "About that song-"

There discussion was cut short when a crowd of students clambered through the door- all cursing the weather. An iconic voice, however, singly cursed a different matter.

"Pansy." Daphne grumbled, addressing the girl with an artificial smile. "And Draco."

Pansy rolled her eyes at him before turning toward the sopping wet Slytherin.

"Raining?" She asked sarcastically.

The smile was wiped from Daphne's face. Draco snorted.

"It is actually." Interjected Millicent from behind Daphne. "But we're all really glad you're dry."

"Yeah," spoke Tracey Davis. "I can't stand the smell of _wet dog_."

Daphne laughed bitterly then they all proceeded towards the girls dormitories whilst smirking at Pansy.

_Eh, bitches. _

"Was it just me or are they more obnoxious today?" She shrugged her shoulders and hoped his question had been rhetorical.

_Dog_\- that insult reverberated in her mind, it always did. The second that she was of age she was flying to St. Mungo's and getting her pug-nose sorted.

She laughed quickly to cover up the effect it had on her and smiled at the boys that had just converged towards the fire.

"Bloody brutal out there!" Blaise complained. "Did you have practise this morning?" The question was aimed at Draco but Crabbe barked: "Yeah. I did."

"I did too" added Goyle proudly and the pair began bragging about how they'd actually been assigned positions.

Oblivious to the others, Draco slid closely to Pansy.

She brought her gaze away from the fire, he ever so slightly nodded at her before placing his hand on her elbow and grazing her arm with his thumb reassuringly.

His withdrew it within seconds and joined in the conversation; but his hand had been there.

It felt as if the girls' insults had brushed off her instantly and she too joined in the conversation; her best attempt to stop herself from smiling.

* * *

**A/n: please review- I'm eager to her our opinions!**


	8. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

'Slow down, Goyle, for Merlin's sake! The food isn't going to suddenly disappear if you take your time to chew!' Pansy scoffed at the slytherin sat opposite her in the great hall that was frantically shovelling shepherds' pie into his mouth.

'Lay off him Parkinson,' Blaise smirked. 'And stop wishing you could be that pie '

Pansy snorted, 'Please!' She paused as Goyle momentarily choked on some potato. 'I'd rather eat slugs!'

'Ahh, doesn't that bring back glamorous memories.' Spoke Draco from the other side of Goyle. 'Speaking of Weaslebee, turns out he's Gryfindoors new keeper.'

Blaise spluttered his drink back into his goblet in disbelief.

'I know right! It's shocking!' Malfoy continued with distaste, 'Potters captain isn't he so figures he'd give the position to his _bestest friend_' He spoke the last words in a mock imitation before scowling over at the gryfindoor table. 'He clearly doesn't take quidditch seriously, it's not about making friendship bracelets and daisy chains! It's about skill, speed, technique and ultimately- success! It's completely ridiculous, bad move on Potters side, then again, what do you expect when you make Scarface captain of... What are you grinning at Parkinson?'

In any other circumstance Pansy would have been horrified that he had seen her smiling at him, however she was too amused to care. 'Guys, this is brilliant news for us!'

Crabbe and Blaise leaned past Malfoy to look at her bemusedly; even Goyle stopped eating long enough to ask, 'How's that?' although he hadn't swallowed which resulted in apple crumble flying across the bench.

'He's utterly useless, right?' She grinned at their confused, nodding faces. 'Remember our first year quidditch lessons with Madam Hooch? He couldn't even get off the ground, he only passed because Granger levitated his broom about a foot in the air and even then he struggled to stay on! I doubt he's gotten any better either, I bet his whole family share one that's second hand.' The boys laughed at this.

'Good one Parks,' said Crabbe.

'What's your point?' Malfoy cut in bluntly.

'There are three rings and I doubt he'll be able to block any of them, he'll keep letting the Quaffle in. Guys, he's gonna make us win!' She watched, paying subtle attention to one in particular, as the realisation kicked into the boys and smiles spread across their faces.

'Clever lass.' Blaise clapped her on the back as they all stood to leave the great hall.

'Malfoy, I think I have an idea for the chant.'

He beamed at her as they made their way back to their dorms. 'Genius, Pansy. Genius!'


	9. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Pansy trudged through the snow trying to keep up with the large strides of the boys as the fifth years made their way to Hogsmead. She had spent the last few evenings in the common room with Draco adding verse after verse to their chant, more than half of which she knew would definitely lose them house points if they were sung at a quidditch match. But she didn't count that as time wasted, although there was a nagging voice in the back of her head that she could have used that time to prepare for her O. , it had been time spent alone with him. No awkward silences or clumsy slip ups on her part, they had been evenings of jovial banter and teamwork. It had always been apparent to her that he would become less moody when his energies were put into mocking others and his favourite people to mock had always been the Weasley's.

She'd found herself silently thanking Merlin for the creation of such a family so that there was something to distract Draco and give him something to laugh about- which is exactly how the two had spent the past evenings; sharing a single armchair and exchanging one liners about that shambolic family. In fact, the two had been so engrossed in this topic it had felt to her as if they were the only two people in the world- which is why it had stunned her when he had suggested they call it a night because they had a Hogsmead trip in the morning and he had plans to meet Astoria...

"Oh.." She prayed that the disappointment she felt didn't show on her face and tried to sound as nonchalant as possible. "You guys are still together?" She could tell her question had made him aware of the small distance between them and fought the urge to inch away.

"Well were not exclusive." He looked away sheepishly. _'Hang on, sheepishly?' _she thought_. 'Malfoy doesn't do anything sheepishly.'_

"She doesn't half bitch if I'm late though, really reminds me of her sister." He made a distasteful expression which made Pansy laugh. This was one of the subtle gestures he made only for Pansy (which she half wished he wouldn't as it only made him more desirable,) he didn't have anything against Daphne himself and only insulted her on the grounds that Pansy couldn't stand the girl. She felt honoured that the only other people Draco defended like this where his parents.

"Well then, you'd best head off to bed," she paused as he rose from the arm chair. "I'd hate to be the reason you stayed up too late." _Oh Merlin, had she just said that? More importantly had he seen her smirk as she said it?!_

He turned around wearing his signature smirk, "What was that, Parkinson?"

She forced her dumbstruck mind to instruct her body to act sassy; this involved her bringing her legs to rest across the arm of the chair so that she now occupied the place where he had been sat. "Run along then, Malfoy." She gestured with her hand, "You must obey the bedtime your girlfriend has given you." This time she openly smirked and accompanied it with a wink.

He raised his eyebrows, an act which enlarged his smokey grey eyes and made Pansy melt a little inside. "She isn't my girlfriend, Parkinson. She's just a very attractive pureblood who happens to be very eager to entertain me."

Pansy made a face as she pushed herself up off of the armchair. "She's thirteen; even you're not that much of a dick to be that way with her." She made to move past him but he stopped her, a sly smile playing on his lips.

"And what way is that, Parks?"

And just like that her body language lost all sassiness; perhaps it was the close proximity between them, or perhaps it was the topic of him being sexual with Astoria, maybe it was the way she could feel him analysing her rapidly dissolving demeanour, either way when Pansy spoke it was a stumble of stuttering syllables.

"Wow, good one" he mocked. "But don't worry, I'm not that way with her, she's just another hot chick who's amazed by my looks and charms and wishes to spend time, money and humour on me." He flashed a toothy grin at her.

"Money? You're not really letting her spend money on you, are you?"

"Of course not, Parkinson. I'm just saying she wants to and it's, well... entertaining."

"Have you ever thought that all your little 'entertainers' will find out that you're being entertained by several other girls?" Pansy scoffed. "And when they find out you're a snake your looks and charms won't be able to protect you from all the hexes and howlers that get sent your way."

"Parkinson, I come from a long line of Slytherins- I'm as cunning and resourceful as they come." He placed one hand on her shoulder. "But it's cute that your concerned for my wellbeing. Cheers."

She could feel her cheeks flush with frustration.

"I don't give a toss about your wellbeing," she lied and shook his hand away with a cold smile. "You're an arse."

His brows furrowed. "I don't see why you're getting so annoyed with me; it's not as if I'm dating you."

She recoiled at his words, only realising afterwards that the Pansy she was trying to be –the Pansy who only wanted to be Draco's friend- would not have been so visually affected by what he had said. She couldn't tell if he had noticed, she didn't dare to look at him in case her face was crimson.

"Whatever, Draco." Too embarrassed to notice that she had referred to him by his first name, she gathered her quill and the bundle of parchment on which they had brainstormed Weasley insults and headed up to her dormitory.

As she left the room she faintly heard him say, "Pansy, wait..."

When she met the boys in the courtyard the following morning Draco wasn't there and was told by Goyle that he had already left to meet someone in Hogsmead.

"Right, come on then," Ordered Blaise. "I'm not standing here another minute its bloody freezing!"

"Were going straight to Honeydukes!" Croaked Crabbe

"Yeah, yeah whatever but then we're going to the Three Broomsticks to warm up." Pansy protested

She caught Blaise eying her up as if amused by something. "Good idea, that's where Malfoy will be so we can meet him there." She stared at him bemusedly and to her surprise he winked at her! "Right, on we go lads. Parkinson, try to keep up."

Momentarily stunned, she watched the boys stroll with ease through the snow before she began trudging after them.


	10. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Crabbe, Goyle, Blaise and Pansy stood in the hallway of the Three Broomsticks covered in snowflakes that had already begun to melt from the warmth of the pub. The group usually stopped here to negotiate who would get the drinks from the bar whilst the others got a booth to sit at (it was always Goyle who got sent to the bar first, before he'd waddle over to the booth and ask Blaise to go back with him to order the right drinks.)

On this occasion, however, there was no need for the others to grab a booth- the whole pub was relatively empty.

"Where the hell is everybody?" said Blaise to no one in particular.

"Maybe the snow put people off coming to Hogsmead?" Pansy suggested. "Or maybe they're studying for the OWL's?"

"Ok so that's where the Ravenclaws are..." Blaise scanned the pub. "I don't believe I'm actually saying this but where are the bloody Gryffindoors?"

"I told you I saw a load of people heading towards the Hogs Head!" bellowed Crabbe loudly.

Pansy rolled her eyes at him, "Don't be daft Crabbe, no one ever goes to the Hogs Head. I'm sure it's just the weather. In fact, if I'd of known it was going to snow this much," she shook her head; covering the boys in more water from her sopping wet hair. "I might have stayed in bed."

"So ladylike, Parkinson." Blaise joked.

Pansy pouted, "You act as if you don't know me."

They laughed and made their way towards their favourite booth.

"Goyle, do you think you could manage to order us the usual?" asked Blaise sarcastically, when he received a blank stare from the boy he sighed and ordered Crabbe to go with him- who sulked off muttering something about the Hogs Head.

As Pansy looked around she realised how empty the pub actually was, sure there was the odd group of older Slytherin students and a few small tables occupied by younger students (whom she didn't care enough for to recognise) but aside from that it was eerily quiet. She was about to say something of the sort to Blaise when he spoke.

"You're letting your guard slip, Parkinson." It was spoken so smoothly, in a way that implied she ought to know what he meant. That typically summed up Blaise- smooth and steps ahead of everybody else.

"And by that you mean..."

"I mean that, inevitably, you're girlish emotions are going to get you hurt and, I say this as your friend but more so as a fellow Slytherin, you don't want your guard to be down when that happens. No one wants to be around a snivelling girl, Parkinson. Especially when it's a friend; its awkward." He said matter-of-factly. "Even more so when a friend is snivelling over a boy-whom is also a friend, you get me?"

Pansy had no idea how to react. _Did Blaise really know? How? How long had he known? Did she make it that obvious? Who else knew? Did Draco know?!_

"I don't-" She began, but was interrupted by Goyle who, right on cue, had waddled back from the bar.

"What was the order again?"

Blaise sighed and rose from his seat; before following Goyle to the bar he looked down at Pansy. "Just think about it, yeah."

"Sure." She croaked, but he was too far away to hear her

She didn't feel like talking much when the drinks came, she was too embarrassed to look at Blaise and it was pointless trying to engage in conversation with the other two. So, as soon as she had finished her pumpkin juice she excused herself to the bathroom.

She couldn't let this mess with her head.

So what if Blaise knew? By the sounds of it he had known for a while and hadn't said anything. _Ugh, that has nothing to do with him being gentlemanly._ She thought. _I bet he's felt so smug especially since I had no idea he knew. _

She swung open the door to the girls toilets and stomped over to the mirror; her cheeks were pink from the warmth of the pub and her wet hair was sticking to her face, she disregarded these factors that she couldn't do much for and attended to her mascara that had smudged underneath her eyes.

"Your girlish emotions are going to get you hurt," She imitated Blaise outloud to herself. "I know that thanks, Zabini, in fact they've already got me hurt." She laughed in spite of herself and finished touching up her face.

_Right Pansy, it's time to up your game. You don't care about him, he's your friend, he's unattainable, and he's just not worth you losing your friends over._ She took a deep breath and stared at her reflection. _You don't love him, ok? You don't love him. You're not in love with him. You don't love him!_

So, having semi convinced herself; she left the toilets and ordered another drink from the bar, that was when she heard them.

"You're, by far, the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen, Astoria." He cooed at the third year-who released an annoyingly high pitched giggle.

"Really, Draco? Because Daphne tells me you spend an awful lot of time with puggy- I mean Pansy Parkinson."

Pansy nearly slipped off her bar stool at the mention of her name and waited in anticipation for Draco's response.

Draco laughed coldly and for a moment Pansy thought he might defend her but instead she heard the unmistakable sound of them kissing and then, "Don't worry about Parkinson, she's honestly nothing compared to you."

_She's nothing compared to you._

"Oi, Miss! You need to pay for your drink." But Pansy ignored the bartender and carried on walking straight to the door.


	11. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

She didn't know where she was walking to, but she knew she had to keep walking; she had to get out of Hogsmead before her tears became too much to hold in.

_You are a Parkinson, get a grip! _She told herself. _Parkinsons don't cry full stop, let alone over a boy in the middle of a village full of people. What would your Father think? He'd be furious, so disappointed. _She inhaled roughly. _Ok, Pansy don't think about your Father right now, that's not going to help. _

She rounded a corner and sped towards the alleyway that ran along the back of Scrivenshaft's Quill shop.

_Oh, I hate it when Blaise is right! I've become such a soppy girl, why has this suddenly become so overwhelming, why does this hurt so much more than it used to. _She quickly wiped away a tear that had escaped and continued towards the end of the alley.

She emerged out from behind a brick wall and was suddenly very aware of her mistake- she had walked in a circle and come out in the busiest place in Hogsmead.

"Oh, look guys. Slytherins' pet dog has been living behind Zonko's!" She didn't know who had shouted it or whom the laughs that followed belonged to- it didn't matter to her. She used all the strength she had to turn her back to them and head in the opposite direction towards the Hogs Head.

_Breathe, Pansy. Be angry; oh please just feel anger instead. _She pleaded with herself in a desperate attempt to mask the pain she was feeling. _Just keep walking until you're out of sight and then.._ Her train of thought was interrupted by a collection of barks and wolf howls from the group behind her.

_Oh, screw it!_

She ran; ignoring the freezing cold that splashed back at her as her feet hit the slushy floor, until she could see the dingy old tavern glaring at her unwelcomingly. She skidded to a halt and breathed heavily; sending out breaths of warm mist against the frosty air. Her sudden burst of energy had dried her eyes and the cold had occupied her mind, making her forget about Draco and the other students.

All she cared about was getting warm and dry, and so eagerly headed towards the doors of the Hogs Head. However, the ground she expected to be crisp with fresh snow- seeing as though students rarely visited this part of the village- was instead, a path of slush and ice.

Her fall was far from graceful and she cursed loudly as she landed hard on her back. Although the pain was bearable, she felt her eyes well up again and attempted to sit up as her liquid exhaustion rolled down her cheeks.

"Merlin, are you alright? That looked downright awful." Spoke a voice Pansy barely recognised. She sniffed and regained her composure before turning to identify the approaching figure.

"Parkinson? What the bloody hell are you doing here?" It was Zacharias Smith; Hufflepuff. He looked back towards the tavern with utter shock on his face. "Are you..?"

"Am I what, Smith?!" She snapped at him.

"Erm.." He looked around hesitantly before eyeing her up with caution.

"What?! For Merlin's sake Smith, are you going to help me up or just stand there gawking at me?" She barked; the pain in her back was beginning to ache something terrible.

He disregarded whatever he had been about to say and moved towards her to help her up.

"It's slippery-" She began.

"You don't say, Parkinson." He replied sarcastically, as he offered her his hand.

"Ugh, I just don't want you falling on top of me."

"Parkinson, I can so easily just leave you stranded in your little icy mess if you want." He dismissed her and went to walk away.

"No! No. Merlin, you sound like a Slytherin." She stated, to which he shrugged matter-of-factly. Pansy sighed and scowled at him. "Please help me up."

As she was hoisted to her feet a sharp pain shot down her back and she had to cling onto his arm to stop herself from falling again.

"Bloody hell," she cursed through gritted teeth. "Why is it so bloody slippery?"

He exhaled impatiently, showing his lack of empathy for her pain. This frustrated Pansy, she deserved some bloody Hufflepuff compassion- what with the kind of day she'd been having- and she had been blessed by this pretentious fake!

She regained her balance and released her grip on him, before asking: "What were you even doing down here, Smith?"

To which he swiftly replied: "Why have you been crying, Parkinson?"

"I haven't," She began defensively. "It's none of your business."

"Exactly." He spoke smugly. "It's none of your business."

She stood in awe, feeling half impressed by the Hufflepuffs pugnacious nature and half annoyed.

"Pansy?"

She turned her head towards the sound of his voice and found Malfoy, Blaise, Crabbe and Goyle collected at the top of the path from which she had ran down earlier. She thought she saw Blaise subtly roll his eyes.

"Nott told us he'd seen you come this way," Barked Crabbe as he skidded and clung to Blaises side; who pulled a face and pushed him off.

"Yeah," Spoke Malfoy as he glared at Smith. "But he failed to mention that you hadn't been alone."

"No, I didn't ..." Pansy began but stopped herself. '_Why should I explain myself to him? After all, I'm nothing compared to his precious little Astoria.__'_

Instead she just smiled, "Never mind."

"Anyway," Said Blaise after a few moments of awkward silence. "We're heading back to the castle, Parkinson." He inclined his head for her to go with them.

She nodded and made her way towards them, keeping her eyes locked on her feet so as not to fall again.

Blaise nodded towards the Hufflepuff in a civil acknowledgment, who returned the gesture before heading back into the tavern.

Pansy walked ahead of the boys for the journey back to the castle, her desperation of needing to climb into a warm, dry bed fuelling her frozen limbs. However, if she had been a few paces slower she might of caught Draco's consistently harsh opinion of Zacharias Smith, which he determinedly shared to the boys all the way back to the Hogwarts courtyard.

"What's she doing hanging with a Hufflepuff anyway?" he asked Blaise. "I mean, he's looks like a frog for Merlin's sake. She can do so much better, don't you think?"

Blaise sighed exasperatedly, "Malfoy I don't care and I really don't see why you do either."

"I... I don't care." Stuttered the blonde, "I just... I don't care."

"Right. Well then," Said Blaise as he patted his friend on the back. "Glad that's sorted."

And with that they made their way into the castle.

* * *

A/N: I have edited and reposted this chapter because it was difficult to read due to formatting and there was no paragraphs where there should have been. Anyway, it should be easier now- enjoy!

Also, I am currently writing the next chapter so it should hopefully be up within the next two weeks, sorry for making you wait. xxx


	12. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"Oh, for merlins sake!" Pansy exclaimed at her reflection when she finally reached her dorm; she looked ten times worse than when she had last caught her reflection in the toilets of The Three Broomsticks. She rolled her eyes and laughed in spite of herself, it was all she had the energy left to do before she changed into her comfy clothes and climbed into bed.

Pansy woke up hours later to the sound of her dorm mates laughing together.

She opened her eyes and rolled onto her side so that she could see out of the window. It appeared to be late in the evening as the half crescent moon was creeping dimly up the greying canopy of sky, straining itself to illuminate the wisps of cloud that choked the stars around it.

She began stretching in her bed- which caught the unwanted attention of the girls.

"My, my, Miss Parkinson." Spoke Millicent in a mocking tone. "You've slept the entire day away."

Pansy gave her a questioning glare, "Whats it to you?"

"Nothing. By the sounds of it you've had quite a busy day." At this Tracy Davis snorted and Daphne smirked at Pansy who returned the comment with a frown.

_Had they seen me running through Hogsmead, oh Salazar! Had they seen me cry? _Pansy panicked to herself but willed her expression to remain unaffected.

"So go on Pansy, tell us the gossip." Millicent flashed an overly false smile.

"Yeah! Don't make us _badger_ it out of you." Tracy squealed at her own joke and glanced at the other girls for appreciation but received only eye rolls.

"What are you talking about?" Pansy asked.

"Oh dear, Parkinson." Daphne said patronisingly as she strutted over to the bed opposite Pansy's. She looked the bedding up and down before deciding to lean against the bed post instead. "Now I know I told you to stay away from Draco; which, by the way, you don't need to do anymore. Astoria told me he says you mean nothing to him so.." She shrugged her shoulders and pouted before adding, "But I didn't mean that you should just go running into the arms of anyone that'll have you. I honestly thought better of you." She laughed and returned to the girls.

"Right, someone needs to tell me what the hell is going on!" Pansy demanded. When the girls just laughed at her she threw the covers off of her and stormed out of the dorm, making the girls squeal even more.

"Stupid bitches." She scorned to herself and she sped down the spiral stair case to the common room. It was empty apart from Draco and Blaise sat in one corner playing wizards chess and a small group of first years sat by the bookshelf frantically scribbling onto parchment. Pansy exhaled to calm herself down, the girls upstairs were making no sense probably just trying to get a rise out of her. She needed to take her mind off of it and wizards chess was an excellent solution.

"Hey guys." She said as she approached the table.

"Hey Parks." Said Blaise without looking up from the board, "You missed dinner, feeling okay?"

"I slept right through it."

"Figured." Blaise moved his knight across the board.

"I brought you back some pudding," Draco said flatly as he handed her a cardboard box. "Thought you'd be hungry after missing dinner doing whatever you were doing, or who ever." He spoke the last bit very quietly so that Pansy couldn't make it out.

"...Cheers, Malfoy." He didn't acknowledge that she had spoken and instead just moved his queen forward.

"Check mate, my friend."

"Damn it!" Swore Blaise, "Another game?"

"Can I play?" asked Pansy

"No." Dismissed Malfoy. "Were doing best out of three."

"Oh." She sighed."Can I play after that?"

"No."

"Malfoy what is your problem?" she challenged.

"Guys, can we not.." Blaise interjected.

"Shut up, Blaise. What is your problem with me, Malfoy."

"I don't have a problem, Parkinson." He spat. "I'm not the one clinging off of the arms of a Hufflepuff!"

Suddenly Pansy came to a realisation. "You've been telling people that me and Zack were.."

"Oh he's 'Zack' now is he?" Malfoy laughed.

"Nope. Nope. I'm done." Blaise stood up, shaking his head- "Night guys," and walked to the boy's dorm.

Oblivious to his departure Pansy continued. "I cannot believe you! Why would you tell Daphne that? You know how much them girls hate me!"

"I don't hear you denying it."

"I don't have to explain anything to you!"Shouted Pansy, suddenly infuriated.

"Don't shout at me, Parkinson. It's not my fault you dabble yourself into other houses precariously."

"At least Zacharias is old enough to know what precarious means." She sniggered. "I'd rather date in another house that date into another decade."

"Meaning what exactly?"

"Admit it, Malfoy. You only date them younger than you... insecure much?" She smirked visciously.

"How dare you! I am not insecure! I only date people younger than me because girls my age are just dogs!" He spat.

She gasped, unable to hide her shock. She tried to conjure up an insult but failed- she was stunned. He'd never used that word around her before as he knew how much she hated it, how much she despised herself for being associated with it. She realised that amid there argument they had both stood from the couches and she sat down, deflated.

"Oh shit. Pansy, I'm so sorry." He walked around the table to sit next to her but she didn't acknowledge him. "I didn't mean it like that. You know I hate anyone who calls you that."

"Except Astoria." She whispered.

"What?"

She couldn't stop herself, she just felt so deflated. "She calls me it all the time, you know that."

"I've never heard her say it."

She laughed. "Yes you have," she flashed back to earlier that day when she'd overhead the two sat in the booth before continuing. "But I'm 'nothing compared to her' right?" She began to stand again; she didn't care much for his responce, she wanted to go back to her dorm and sleep. But he placed a hand on her shoulder and gently brought her back to the couch.

"Is that why you went off with Zacharias?" he questioned.

She laughed exasperatedly. "I slipped on the ice and just happened to show up and help. That's all."

"Oh, so you weren't jealous of Astoria?"

"Malfoy, you've made it clear you don't want me so.."

"I don't think I've ever done that." He intererupted. Pansy could feel her eyes widen and was grateful that she was not facing him.

"What?"

"Err.. I didn't- that wasn't," he stumbed. "Haha, I'm rambling on I must be tired." He swiftly stood up from the couch. "Speak to you tomorrow Pansy, I mean err Pansy." And with that, followed Blaises footsteps to his dorm. Pansy could have sworn she heard him hiccup as he left.


	13. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

The next couple weeks went by without either of them mentioning what had been said that evening. Pansy couldn't believe she had shown so much emotion to him; made herself so vulnerable, too vulnerable. She needed to get her head together, focus on her OWL's and avoid her feelings- continue avoiding love. At first she had expected him to say something, only to scorn herself later when she realised that she was stupid for thinking that. He acted as if they had never argued, as if he had never implied anything and so she soon accepted just that- he had not been implying anything. Their discussion was forgot about, and things went back to how they had always been, _sigh. _

"Ready for the match boys?" shouted Marcus Flint from the other end of the Slytherin dinner table. It was the first day of the quidditch season; Slytherin vs Gryffindor and the nerves and excitement could be felt from every student in the school.

"Born ready." Returned Malfoy, although his face seemed a little paler than normal.

"Great," Flint beamed back at him. "Can't wait for this chant, it's gonna be golden! See you down there." He grabbed a slice of toast and strolled out of the great hall.

"That kid has far too much energy in the morning," Blaise grumbled.

"He's the quidditch captain; they're practically selected on their ability to stay over-enthusiastic all the time." Pansy added as she poured orange juice into her goblet- which Crabbe swept up and downed in one.

"Oi!"

"Cheers." He flashed her a grin, spitting orange juice over Draco's toast. "Sorry mate."

Draco simply stared at his soggy breakfast in disgust.

"This is going to be hilarious!" Pansy piped up. "I've made sure the whole house knows my signal when to start- I'm basically the conductor!" she squealed.

"But how are we going to see your signal if we're playing?" asked Goyle.

Blaise rolled his eyes, "you're not going to be singing, douche bag." To which both Crabbe and Goyle moaned in disappointment.

"Ok Miss Conductor, when are you going to signal the beginning of our fantastic symphony?" Draco questioned with a smirk.

"As soon as he fails to save the first goal, I'm thinking around..." she pretended to do a calculation in her head. "20 seconds in?"

"Brilliant," Draco chuckled. "You're brilliant." There was barely any time for her to acknowledge what he had said before he added hastily- "I still can't believe Potter put Weasley as keeper. It's just idiocy."

"Well, that's just Gryffindors for you isn't it. Now c'mon eat your soggy toast or you're going to be late." She urged.

"Lost my appetite," he excused himself and stood up from the table. "Crabbe, Goyle, come on. We've got a match to win." The two quickly crabbed a handful of breakfast muffins before obeying. Draco turned to Pansy and smiled, "Do me proud."

She returned the smile and nodded before adding, "And you." Then watched the three boys leave the great hall.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

Blaise had been watching her with his eyebrows raised, shaking his head. He raised his palms defensively and shrugged.

"Oh shut up." She scorned.

He laughed at her. "Now, now Parks. Come on, let's get some decent seats."

He downed the remains of his orange juice and got up from the table, when she didn't budge he went to pick her up from under her arms.

"Alright, alright." She laughed and they followed the crowd out of the great hall.


	14. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

In the stands overlooking the quidditch pitch, Pansy and Blaise pushed their way through the crowd of howling Slytherins to get the best seats near the front, Pansy needed these seats if she was going to lead the chant.

"Out of my way," barked Blaise at a third year before turning round to Pansy and mumbling, "Cheeky little bastards."

Pansy snorted at his remark, he truly was a golden example of all things slytherin- it made her proud to be his friend.

"Don't you dare touch me you cretin!" He shouted at someone Pansy couldn't see. "That kid just went to bite me, bloody creep."

"Let's try and make it to our seats with all of our limbs please, Zabini." She joked.

They wrestled their way towards their seats and could see the pitch perfectly; both the Slyrherin and Gryffindor teams had just marched onto the pitch for the captains to shake hands. Pansy couldn't make out all of the players on the apposing team- there was little scrawny Potter and then the red headed Weasleys stood out like a sore thumb, but she had no clue about the rest. In all fairness she could barely make out who was who on the Slytherin team!

Flint was the one in front (but she only knew that because he was shaking hands with the other captain,) she couldn't tell the difference between the two beaters- Crabbe and Goyle looked like identical green quaffles from this distance!

So it annoyed her greatly when she easily recognised **him**.

She told herself it was his hair that stood out, or his broomstick or his cocky walk, but it was none of those things- all of the players' hair looked the same colour and their walks were all stunted by having to carry their broomsticks.

She could tell which one he was and she had no idea how she knew; things like this made it impossible for her to deny her feelings to herself.

"What?" Blaise asked all of a sudden, this took Pansy by surprise as she was deep in thought.

"Woah don't jump out of youre skin." He reassured her, when she gave him a confused look he continued. "You sighed... like really loudly."

"Oh, I hadn't even realised." She hoped she wasn't going red. "I'm surprised you heard me over all this racket." She gestured to the Slytherins behind her.

"Yeah, but you need to make it much louder than this?" he smirked.

She returned the gesture and laughed, "But not yet, we've got to wait till Weasley misses."

"...THE QUAFFEL IS RELEASED... AND THE GAME BEGINS!" roared the commentator as the balls began soaring around the sky. The players, now airborne, began dodging and diving around each other; all with their own agenda to accomplish.

The crowds in the stands were buzzing with anticipation and excitement and Pansy could feel the community spirit of her fellow Slytherins as they all cheered and encouraged their team on. Pansy thought this was the best part of quidditch, the way it brought out Slytherins competitiveness also brought out the best in them; the anticipation that highlighted the element of doubt they had in themselves- that Slytherin doesn't think it will win no matter what, Slytherin isn't being big-headed, it is to be ruthless and committed as well as compassionate and encouraging.

No one outside of the house would ever understand the pride that came with being a Slytherin- the love of belonging to the house most unloved. Pansy cherished her house with dignified respect, she cherished these moments when she felt part of a community and loved it! She couldn't imagine feeling this way in any other house, Slytherin was her family...

"GO DRACO BABY GO!" screamed Astoria from somewhere behind Pansy.

..._and you can't choose your family, _she mumbled internally and focused on watching the game to drown out Astoria's high pitched cheer.

It wasn't long before Slytherin scored the first point... and a second... and a third and 'Weasley is our King' was well underway.

"...HE ALWAYS LETS THE QUAFFLE IN

THAT'S WHY SLYTHERINS ALL SING

WEASLEY IS OUR KING..."

Pansy stood with her back to the pitch conducting the chorus, she had been worried of having so much attention on her, as she was not used to it, but most people got the gist of the chant pretty quickly and had continued to watch the game whilst singing. However, Pansy didn't move back to her seat- she felt empowered and responsible as if she were actually playing the game. She could hear the commentator announcing goal after goal and she couldn't help but think that the chant had something to do with it.

"ANOTHER GOAL TO SLYTHERIN!"

"HE CANNOT BLOCK A SINGLE RING..."

"AND HARRY POTTER HAS CAUGHT THE SNITCH, GRYFFINDOR WINS BY 10 POINTS!" boomed the commentator although his words were drowned out by the cheering from the rest of the stadium.

"Unlucky." Pansy heard Blaise mutter beside her, "One more goal and we would have won that, even with Potter catching the snitch. Did Malfoy even see it?"

But Pansy wasn't listening to him; instead her attention was on the cluster of players forming on the stadium ground. She saw Potter and the Weasley twins' posture straighten up- as if someone had struck a nerve with them.

Without even seeing Malfoy she knew what was happening.

_Oh, Salazar!_

Within seconds the twins had charged the Slytherin seeker and had pinned him to the ground whilst Potter kicked him before proceeding to sit onto of him and punch him several times.

"MALFOY!" Pansy knew that would do no good but she couldn't help it, it was physically painful for her to witness.

_Is no one else seeing this?_ She panicked looking round at the crowds who seemed oblivious to the assault happening below them. _Get yourself together Pansy the boy you love needs your help!_

She scanned the stand for anybody who could help, "PROFESSOR UMBRIDGE!" she screamed when she noticed the plump woman sat several benches across. "PROFESSOR, PLEASE."

She caught the woman's attention and pointed down at the pitch. "HELP HIM!"


	15. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

Pansy had felt useless being held up in the crowd only able to watch from a distance as Malfoy was beaten by the Gryffindor team until, after what seemed like ages to Pansy, they were separated by Madame Hooch.

As Pansy barged through the crowd, leaving Blaise behind, she lost sight of Malfoy and the Gryffindors- this urged her to keep pushing until she reached a clear set of stairs meant for professors only.

_Screw it!_

She bolted down the stair not caring if she lost points for Slytherin, she couldn't think straight, she just needed to know he was ok.

The staircase folded off into a wooden corridor with tent like curtains for walls, this told Pansy she was standing amidst the structure of the stadium. The walls were visually strained- they rippled rigidly, clearly held down tightly to hug the skeletal structure and hide passageways like this one.

She carried on down the corridor, the wooden floorboards groaning and creaking beneath her feet as she ran. Occasionally there was a rip in the walls, obviously where a bludger had pierced straight through, here the fabric danced frantically and whipped at Pansy as she darted past. Ahead she saw a door that she knew would undoubtedly be locked, she didn't waste any time and reached for her wand before she'd even reached it.

"Alohamora!" she commanded as the door unbolted and she continued on.

When she eventually found her way out of the corridor and down towards the pitch, Malfoy was gone. In fact the only thing that told her she was in the right place was the very visible pool of blood on the floor. Pansy was just about to spin and head to the hospital wing when someone called her name, well, not her name...

"Oi, Pug face!"

She shot a glance over her shoulder to Angelina Johnson. "Think you're funny do ye? Singing garbage like that, getting my team all wound up. Christ, if being ugly weren't enough for you but no, you've got to be a bitch too." Johnson laughed. "I guess being a bitch comes hand in hand with being a pug, ey piggy?" Other Gryffindors began oinking and snorting behind her.

"You seriously don't want to piss me off right now, Johnson." Pansy barked.

"Or what?" she challenged. "Going to insult my 'worm hair' again? Please, save me the pathetic insults."

"No" Pansy smiled. "But I can, and will, get your best players banned from quidditch for good."

"Oh right, good luck with that dogface."

"Cheers," Pansy grinned accompanied by a very rude hand gesture before leaving towards the hospital wing.

She sped into the castle and, in what seemed like no time at all, had navigated her way through the moving staircases and to the hospital wing; not even realising how out of breath she was. When she got there the hospital wing was empty except for Malfoy who was sitting on the edge of one of the beds whilst his face, all bloody and swollen, was cleaned by Madame Pomfrey.

"This is the first time you've come to me with an actual injury, Draco Malfoy." She poked fun at the boy who winced as his wounded were touched.

"Yes, well can you be quick about cleaning them then." He demanded. "The less time I spend in here the better."

Meanwhile Pansy had approached the bed and was stood behind Madame Pomfrey watching her hastily splash cleaning solution onto a cloth and rub it across Malfoy's face. She had an urge to shout at the nurse for acting as if the assault that these wounds were from was some sort of joke.

"Can you not be a bit gentler with him?" She scorned.

But apparently neither Malfoy nor Madame Pomfrey had been aware that Pansy was even in the room as they both jumped in shock- resulting in cleaning solution being splashed into Malfoy's open wounds.

"AHH!" Cried Malfoy.

The nurse simply muttered "Oh dear," whilst the boy winced in pain.

"For Merlin's sake you bloody idiot!" he shouted to which the nurse snorted and left the room.

Pansy perched on the bed next to him and instantaneously touched his arm. "Are you ok? What a useless woman, she's meant to know what she's doing. I bet she'd be a lot more sympathetic if a Hufflepuff had rocked up here with a busted up face."

He didn't reply straight away, probably because he was negotiating with himself whether Pansy's hand was really on his forearm- and if it was should he acknowledge it- or whether it was an after affect of the agony he was in.

Eventually he spoke, "Is my face really busted up?" He turned to face the girl to offer his face up for inspection. Pansy hesitated before ever so gently pinching his chin between the side of her index finger and her thumb and slowly brought his head to the side so that she could see from a different angle.

The bridge of his nose was crooked and had already begun to bruise forcing his eyes to squint; he had a split on one of his right eyebrow that was still bleeding and his left cheekbone stuck out predominantly- even more than usual. He had a glossy streak of dried blood on his forehead which appeared to have trickled down from his head due to a section of his platinum hair scruffily dyed scarlet. His hair was still messy from playing quidditch in the wind, it seemed perfectly windswept and ragged. She guided his head back to face her and noticed the dried blood on his upper lip- evidence that his nose has been bleeding. His lips were untouched though. Perfectly plump and... Inviting.

"Parks?"

She was brought to his eyes, frosted grey with echoes of deep silver shadows. "Mmh?" she answered.

"Is my face bust..." he stopped, and Pansy was suddenly painfully aware that she had been obviously staring into his eyes, whilst still holding his chin. She dropped her hand and shook her head.

"No, it's bad: I mean it's _not_ _bad_ its ok, its fine." She stammered.

His gaze was unusual; he was looking at her as if she had just brewed the most difficult potion to perfection. Perfection, he was looking at her as if she was perfection.

She watched as his eyes seemed to scan her face inquisitively and then rest on her lips before smirking ever so slightly and softly. Pansy felt his hand drift past hers but daren't look away from his stare, his hand found its way to her face where it brushed a strand of hair behind her ear slowly. It then grazed her jaw line before holding her chin between the side of index finger and his thumb.

"Pansy?" he asked quietly.

And she nodded.

He brought her face closer to his and inclined his head slightly, their faces were inches apart and she could feel his breath against her skin. She felt utterly overpowered and willing for this boy, for this moment. His nose brushed past hers and she restrained, she didn't want to hurt his injuries but he exhaled a single laugh and whispered, "Kiss me." To which Pansy closed her eyes leaned closer and the hospital wing door swung open.

The pair sprang apart like elastic.

"Miss Parkinson, get off my patient and move so that you're not in the way." Madame Pomfrey spoke, matter-of-factly.

Pansy scrambled off of the bed and made some distance between her and the others whilst the nurse continued cleaning Malfoy's face.

Pansy couldn't believe what had just happened! She forced herself to think of something else, anything! The last thing she wanted was to be asked by the nurse why she had suddenly turned crimson!

Instead she began looking around the room desperately looking for something to distract her from what had nearly happened, her pulse was still racing a million miles an hour and her stomach was experiencing the aftermath of extreme butterflies.

Suddenly she saw something that made her pulse freeze.

She had spotted a window, on the other side of which, stood her mother. Only it wasn't her mother, and it wasn't a window... It was a mirror.

She gasped aloud and received a very annoyed stare from Madame Pomfrey.

"It's only blood child, get a grip!"

But she wasn't paying attention; she was consumed by her reflection to notice the lecture the nurse was giving her. The resemblance she bestowed of her mother; so willing to please, so desperate for love, so naive. Her cheeks were still flushed from having run up many flights of stairs, her hair had fallen out and was clearly a mess but it was her eyes hat distressed her the most.

They showed how vulnerable she truly was due to love- weakness. She slowly turned her attention towards the boy who was making her feel so weak r feel so weak and to her surprise he was already looking at her. His face had been cleaned up and there was barely any evidence of his injuries but he looked concerned.

"Pansy?"

She gave one more glance to the mirror and realised her eyes were once again betraying her and filling up with fear and embarrassment.

"I have to go." She managed to croak out before running towards the hospital wing door.

* * *

**Authors note: Thank you so much to everyone who has read this story up to this point, I hope you have been enjoying it. I really appreciate and always look forward to hearing your reviews and what you have to say about the chapters and they really motivate me to keep writing. I have received some very lovely reviews but have not been able to reply because of them being anonymous or my computer not letting me send messages, but if you would like to tell me what you think of the story (good and bad I would appreciate constructive criticism) feel free to PM me and I will be sure to get back to you as quick as I can. **

**Sorry that I am not consistent with uploading chapters and im sorry if my spelling is awful.**

**Thanks guys hope you're all doing well and il have another chapter up as soon as I can.**

**xxx**


	16. Chapter 14

**Chapter****14**

_DON'T THINK. JUST KEEP WALKING!_

She screamed to herself, she knew if she stopped to analyse what had just happened she would crumble from humiliation and shame.

As she sped down the empty school corridors she had to fight her mind that teased her with bitter reverberating images of his mouth moments away from hers.

She was moments away from ultimate relief-

_enclosed in treacherous self loathing! _She reminded herself.

_How had this happened? After years of rejecting my mother's weakness in my blood_ and masking the painful truth of how I really feel...

She stopped abruptly and doubled over, she hadn't realised that her breathing had become hyperventilated and she forced herself to control it.

"Pathetic," she whispered through jagged breaths.

Although she knew her reaction was justified; this was not just some crush she had let slip, this had been her life for the past 5 years. Faking had become so ordinary to her, as well as the pain and sharp resentment she had grown to associate with Draco's name. To walk alongside him fearing that she would never be able to reach for his hand, whilst being terrified of whom she would become if she could. The discrimination from other girls, the semi acceptance from boys, the betrayal to her mother and the rejection from her father all weighed down upon her until she felt she had no space to breathe!

But being that close to him... being touched by him had instantaneously lifted her burdens, she had forgotten about them all, forgot about everything but one very special thing.

"I love him." She straightened up, her breathing suddenly controlled.

"I love him." She repeated out loud as if confirming a theory.

At this she felt her stomach un-tighten. She leaned back against the cool brick walls of the corridor, and witnessed her own self hatred dissolve.

"Oh Merlin," she cursed, yet a smile was spreading across her face. "I need to tell him."

She retraced her way down she had just scrambled through only this time with a clear head. He'd made her head clear; he'd made her pain stop. Of course fighting and being restraining by feelings she thought she was cursed with would only bring her discomfort, she was terrified of becoming what she despised so much that she never gave herself a chance to become something different. It had never occurred to her that indulging in her fears would bring her such life, such reassurance, such love.

She reached the top of the staircase that led to the grand hospital wing doors and was greeted by a rather flustered Madame Pomfrey.

"Rude, ungrateful, pompous creatures!" she muttered to herself as she paced back and forth in front of the wooden doors. She reached into her pinafore pockets and withdrew a pocket watch before muttering something sarcastically to herself.

"Madame Pomfrey?" Pansy spoke hesitantly.

"Ah, you again!" The elderly nurse snapped. "He's got another one in there now; requested I 'give them some time alone' he did." She imitated Malfoy's posh accent before laughing harshly.

Pansy could feel her head begin to cloud over and forced herself to ask what she dreaded.

"Another one?" she spoke softly.

"Yes, Parkinson" replied the woman, clearly oblivious to Pansy's vulnerable demeanour. "One of the Greengrass girls scurried in about 10 minutes ago and Mr Malfoy rudely suggested I leave them to it." She scoffed and pulled a disgusted face. "Crude I tell you! And downright..."

The rest of her complaining became inaudible as Pansy slowly turned and began making her way back down the stairs.

* * *

a/n- I want to apologise for my inconsistent posting of chapters. Hope you all enjoy next chapter up very soon as im writing it right now! :)


	17. Chapter 15

**Chapter 16**

Pansy walked the grounds for the next few hours; she needed to escape from her head and knew this to be the only way she could. Whenever she came across a stray branch or brick on her path she would levitate it, or destruct it with whichever charm reflected her state of mind in that second. Charms were like therapy to her and Merlin knows she needed it right then!

When she made her way back to the Slytherin common room it must have been past curfew, there were no other students or teachers around and the portraits were all getting ready for bed.

She entered the common room sluggishly but was soon taken aback by the glorious green lights that greeted her; the moonlight shining onto the lake was reflected through the windows in dancing patterns as the wind tickled the water. The whole room was full of the dark green glow that calmed her senses, reminded her of the pride she felt of being slytherin, and reminded her of him.

"Parkinson."

He spoke soothingly, so soft at first Pansy thought she had imagined it.

He coughed in his throat before saying, "Pansy?"

He emerged from a deep green shadow beside the window, and made his way towards her.

_Calm your breathing. You already know what you're going to say to him. _She attempted to sooth her nerves.

He reached within a metre of her before Pansy laughed making him to stop cold.

"What's so funny?" he questioned.

"Listen, Malfoy." She began, repeating the script she had constructed in the last hour in her head. "We don't need to have this talk- you know the one," she added at his puzzled reaction. "I know you too well by now. You were probably on a rush from the adrenaline or drowsy from some healing magic..."

"Pomfrey never used any healing magic," He interrupted, but she continued as if he had not spoken; she needed to, she needed this conversation to be over.

"...And on my part?" She shrugged her shoulders, "Well, I don't know what I was thinking, I guess I was just glad you were okay."

He scrunched up his face, "Right."

"Yeah, and you've got Astoria and god knows who else!" she raised her voice more than she had intended to, "It'd be ridiculous really and totally impossible and just... why are you shaking your head?"

"I don't understand why you're saying these things?"

"Because..." She took a noticeably deep breath, "We're friends Draco and you know as well as I do that it's best that way."

She moved past him towards the girl's dormitory, not daring to look at him lest he see the emotion building up in her eyes. She blinked away her frustration as she reached the door.

"Screw that!" he exclaimed.

Suddenly he was close to her; she felt his arm round her waist as he spun her round to face him.

His eyes were locked on her; engulfing every feature of her face before resting on her mouth, but she didn't have any time to acknowledge this; she barely had time to breathe before she felt her head clear as his lips parted hers.

The sensation of his lips on hers startled her so much that she backed away from the kiss, forcing him to remove his hands from the small of her back so that they were, instead, stood with their body's inches apart; his eyes absorbing her hungrily.

She snaked her arms around his neck and pulled his mouth to meet hers again.

Their lips moved rhythmically like magnets as if they knew each other's movements before they had made them, fitting so perfectly; it felt so right!

He leant on her to walk her backwards towards the wall, slightly knocking the breath out of her as her back connected with solid wood. He retreated from the kiss as if scared he'd hurt her.

This sort of compassion was so alien on him that it made her laugh before inclining her chin to kiss him lightly. She then traced kisses from his mouth to his jaw bone, where she softly blew against his neck; he tightened his grip on her back as her breathe against his skin made his nerves vibrate.

Full of passion, he kissed her lips again and, when the passion was returned, he deepened the kiss. He pulled on her waist so as to draw her closer to him and she ran her hands through his hair, creating a mess of his perfectly tamed locks.

When their lips finally parted it was only so that he could trace kisses from her chin to the nape of her neck, softly nipping her every so often- Pansy was grateful for this as it brought her back to reality momentarily.

_Reality. _Her mind jolted awake.

"Malfoy," she murmured as he kissed her neck.

He only took this as encouragement to persist,

"Malfoy?" she spoke more clearly.

"mmhm?" he mumbled in between kisses.

She placed her hands on his shoulders to remove his face from her neck.

"After I'd left the hospital wing... you had other visitors didn't you?" she questioned hesitantly.

He sighed, "Yeah, Astoria came to see me and.."

"...and you needed some time alone with her, right?" She said harshly, removing her hands from his shoulders in disgust.

"Yeah, I did." He said smugly.

_I knew it, _she thought, disheartened.

"I didn't want the nurse watching me break up with her."

"What?" Pansy asked.

"I've been waiting four years for you to even flirt back with me, Pansy." He began, brushing a piece of hair behind her ear. "I was beginning to think that the one girl I actually wanted might be the _only _girl who had zero interest in me."

She exhaled an astonished laugh, "Is that supposed to be romantic, Malfoy?"

"No, just honest. I find you to be rather special, Parkinson, I always have."

He kissed her once more and she smiled against his lips.

"Goodnight, Pansy Parkinson." He beamed at her, before kissing her gently on the forehead and leaving towards the boy's dormitory.

She stared at the fire place until she heard the click of the door closing behind him which confirmed that he had left the common room.

_Salazar!_

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_a/n- _All rights go to JK Rowling, I only own the plot. Thank you to everyone who has continued to read this far. 3


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